Unf.

No drawing today, I just couldn't draw anything.. Today has been pretty shit. Been really emotional, have been crying on and off almost all day. Basically my best friend leaves for Uni tomorrow and came in today to say bye.. I didn't really want to say bye to any of my good friends who were leaving for Uni because of the effect it would've had on me. I now, officially, have no best friends in Hastings.. Or anywhere near to me. I mean, tbh, my best friends are my "rocks" so to speak.. And I just have this huge epic empty gap now and I can't fill it.

I just.. I don't know, feel like giving up? I'm the unintelligent one of the group; I don't want to go to uni, I dropped out of college after my AS Levels.. I'm the one who will always be left behind whilst they suceed and it's a hard thing to admit too.

I just dunno what I'm gonna do now. I've got ... what...  two friends out of work now? people at work don't really count as, well, I work with them. i have to see them everyday, as much as i love seeing most of them, it's not the same.

i have a sinking feeling that someone whom i may work with has read my blog.. why? because out of the blue, Kim (commercial) decided to tell me I'm doing a good job, and she's seen improvement in me.. and has been singing my praises to Brian. And in my last entry on this blog I was saying about how unappreiciated I feel at work, and how my effort seems to be ignored. strange, and creepy. Unf. I'm probably being paranoid, but whatever, you have to admit - it's bloody weird! oh well.

so yeah. not a great day.. oh and i have a new nickname courtesy of Brian.. that being "angry becky." uhm, thanks, i think? lol! i'm not that bad, am I????

who knows. oh well.